Saturday, March 8, 2014

Clearing Out the Cobwebs and Simplifying..

After much thought, I finally closed my AbsoluteArts and CafePress shops.

Not a big deal really because after about fifteen years, I rarely made any sales.  I kept telling myself that maybe one day they would generate something to fall back on so that I could just paint.  I finally let it go.  Letting go is good!

I will continue to use the Etsy Shop because I still like how it works so far.  I've only had a few sales there too, but maybe I won't feel so scattered. Besides, I like Etsy, still handcrafted and from the artist.

I hope that I can manage to work on that and not let myself become overwhelmed by self-doubt.  A big problem right now.  That and apathy.  Having no energy.  Being a lump.  Not being able to retain any thoughts in my head.  Not remembering  how things are done.

Technology has not been my friend, or friendly to me.  So when I'm trying to grasp something in my mind and I can't get it, it usually fades away and I don't do anything at all.  At a standstill for so many years.

But lately I've found, in my frame of mind, it is difficult to even paint.  It has been difficult to do anything at all.  On my days off from work, I stay in my pajamas and mostly in bed.  That's the whole three days.  I live like a hermit in a cave.  The medications I take  have helped with my pain but my outlook on what I use to enjoy in life has been rather dim.

I do feel like a burden has been lifted off me, a weight that I finally was able to cut out of my life. Simplifying is good. 

With one health issue or another always seeming to get in the way it became more than I could bear to even check the sites, let alone up date them!  Kind of like my blog here!  Tossed aside like a used and crumpled tissue.  Pushed aside like the pile of mail on the table spillling onto the floor.  Piling up like my laundry and dishes.

The cat is staring at me again, so it is time for me to clean the litter and feed her again.  Then I'll attempt to do some of the dishes since there is no room in the sink and there's nothing clean to use anymore. Tomorrow I'll attempt to haul out part of the laundry to be done. bleh.

Or, I could binge watch "Fringe" again! or cat videos!!  Getting rid of my TV hasn't helped there!  Binge watching stuff on my computer is so much easier. And who knows? Maybe my doppelganger in the parallel universe is doing much better.  What's the crazy lady babbling about? If you haven't watched Fringe, you should.
I'm sensing a pattern here.



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